Evan Kessler Dot Com

The Home of the Brave

Every Sperm is Sacred to Duggar Family

Posted by evankessler on September 1, 2009

If there’s one thing we’ve learned from Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life (and probably The Bible) it’s that every sperm is sacred–great even. If any of those sperm gets wasted god gets quite irate. But at what point do little bundles of joy you create stop being bundles of joy and start just being time consuming things you start referring to as “hey kid.”  For John and Kate Gosselin the number was somewhere between two and eight when they decided all of those kids were cutting into their Vegas and “The View” hosting time.  However, as the saying goes, it’s diff’rent strokes for diff’rent folks and for the Duggars, the effing nymphomaniacs of TLC’s17 Kids and Counting,” 18 is simply not enough.  Despite the fact that they probably couldn’t list off all of their kids under 60 seconds without forgetting a few, Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar have just announced that they their happy northwest Arkansas home has a 19th refusal to use birth control on the way.   With 18 other kids ranging in age from 0-21 and a grandie down the pipe, it’s unlikely they’ll stop mass producing until they are recognized as their own sovereign industrialized nation whose chief export is touching reality show moments. By 2016 they’re even expected to field a top flight Olympic squad in time for that year’s Summer Games at an as yet undetermined site.  Go for the gold Duggars!  And while you’re at it…go for #20!

 

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