Evan Kessler Dot Com

The Home of the Brave


Posted by evankessler on January 31, 2008

Last night, several dudes and I (you might even call us total pussies) entered theater 5 at Regal Cinemas Union Square to see Rambo. An hour and a half later (give or take, probably take) when we emerged from the theater, we were men (or at least no longer total pussies). We’d never been in the shit before and after being transported to Burma through the eyes of John Rambo, we were in the thick of it. There was little room for talk, only action. Blood and guts were everywhere, limbs separated from bodies, heads exploded, bodies sliced in half by a single bullet. When the dust settled and the bullets stopped flying, we stood alone with John Rambo and some Christian missionaries from Colorado, proud to be Americans. I don’t know if we get to play Burma in the next World Cup, but if we do, I hope they play Rambo on the Jumbotron the entire way through just to show those Burmese pussies that we Americans don’t fuck around.

p.s. No Burmese people were harmed in the writing of this post.


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